The Nine Whens
(after seeing No Sex Please, We’re British on 8-15)
When one starts consulting one’s watch within fifteen minutes of the start of the play, it is probably not a good sign, not a good time.
When you’re watching a so-called farce and exclaiming inwardly that it does not make any sense, then it means you cannot suspend yourself from reality as any good Farce requires.
When you’re ready to leave at intermission time but cannot due to your car being held hostage I. e. being blocked in.
When only half the audience is laughing, and some, one suspects, from requirement.
When one keeps remembering that this is over $50 of tickets and two hours of time, both lost irrevocably and irretrievably as though in the Sargasso sea.
When you want to post an opinion on your Neighborhood Blog or Newspaper but fear offending even more people than usual. After all, this is an old and established Regional Theater, which usually presents good plays that are well-acted.
When you think of the stage version of Arsenic and Old Lace , among many others, and remember how funny they were.
When you vow on a stack of frozen playlets never to return.
When you exit snarling, stage right.
When you wonder if you, and only you, has just seen a Naked Emperor.