Outside the Bar, By the Wall-Duet for two persons, three voices
Woman
You said you’re not Gay.
But you’re not pure straight.
Man
I’m Bi, if that hurts things.
Woman
Why didn’t you just say that?
Man
If I did, you would of only heard that. Only heard disease words,
AIDS, Herpes, short Jewish Drag Queens. And I’ve walked past most
doors I used to-
Woman
But you could of told me
that you….
Man
I don’t know who I am, anymore, or what parts of me matter,
it’s been so long since love could walk anyplace.
Woman
What are you looking for?
Man
A person, a pleasure, a reason, a being,
A house to walk past in winter
Woman
What does the mirror answer?
Man
My good points
I’m loyal, patient, solicitous, easy to feed, and don’t take up
much space
My bad points
I’m passionate, I either love
like fire or mud
and I’m a barnacle
with tentacles
must find the North sea shining snow
the Ark Tik glow and go
not live in
har bour stud ies
Woman
What about your past?
Man
Which one?
Woman
The woman you said-
Man
She’s over, I’m over
It wasn’t never a there to be over with, so it’s gone and dry.
I loved, she watches, time passes.
Woman
But if she was here right now
offering you a rose a ring a rope
giving you new news of her old noose
retraining you for her chains and chants
she’d have her blonde saddle mounted
you’d be gone
like the midnight dawn
Man
Hey, she won’t, it ain’t, you can’t
un paint
the past
Woman
Tell me you don’t still have a crying for her
Tell me you don’t still have eyes that look at me
with the scream of her in them
Man
But I need you-
Woman
For a time
hoping she’ll ride you again
But in the mean time
when she’s too mean to give you time
too un seen
to give you mean and mean
ing
just a far star voice
and you can’t
caress
her voice
Man
I did, I don’t, I won’t
It’s gone, it’s dawn, fool’s pawn
to Denver
Period. End of sentence. End of time.
Woman
You mean you don’t still want her breaking you
into tiny, fitful, pieces.
Does it matter
if the drowning man
loves the ocean
if the rose
loves the fire
if the crippled pigeon
loves the lava
Don’t use me then as
A time to mark
between her marks
or as
a pause be tween sparks
or as a brief time
the pause that refleshes
Man
But I-I really do-I mean T could-I could of-before her
Woman
I’m going back in for beer and sympathy
Don’t
care to join me (starts walking off)
Man
Yeah,well, I got some talking to do, me and the wall, see,
and it’s real important, see, and it’s something ’bout a
train, yeah, I didn’t see coming and I can’t see leaving and
maybe I oughta go find it.
Bob Small-original 12/17-revised 12/24-cuts and adds done
on 12/24/83 by me and the fabulous. Roni Chernin-typed 12/26/83
robertthesmall 